Ben Ray's blog

What's Next?

2007-05-03T07:11:00.000-05:00

So I stopped hurting so bad, and really was back to being my totally obnoxious self by probably the middle of the day Tuesday. Don't believe what they say in Runner's World, kids, drinking heavily CAN lead to a strong marathon recovery. Honestly, if it wasn't for the sheer volume of work I have to do (that's an utter lie, I blow off work all the time), or the fact that I completely swore off running until Saturday, I'd be hitting the road today, and probably have done it yesterday, too.

So the good news is, being done with the marathon means I can back off of training like crazy and do a little bit more of what I want--the bike is starting to look a little cobwebby. The bad news is, and I have no better way to put this, I am all out of Crusades.

My personality is such that I have to have some all-consuming passion at all times in my life. It used to be my fraternity (Because, well, if you don't know the story, I can't explain it here, but I transferred into my grandfather's chapter and tried to fix a colossal debt, a hazing culture, and a drug problem.), but after I lost that battle and the chapter closed, I said ok, I'm going to run a marathon. Thankfully, that adventure turned out better, but to say the least, I obsessed over it.

Now, I don't really have anything left to obsess over, and it's got me feeling kind of lost. I mean, I've got schoolwork, and our finals are coming, and then summer classes, and then my last term ever...but schoolwork has never been somethingto ignite my passion, and that's what I'm after here. School is just a job, something I'll do to get where I really want to be (oddly enough, grad school. But leave my hippocracy out of this, because I'm taking so **** many classes out of my major right now it's not funny. Freaking liberal arts schools.). What I want now, is the next way I can define myself.

Ben Ray, Beta Theta Pi, Marathoner, ???

Oh, this hurts.

2007-04-29T08:20:00.000-05:00

I finished--4: 21:45

I was on the 4:15 pace group all race, until I started to fall back around 22 miles, and then cramps on the bridge finished me off, focing me to stop and stretch and go slower for the last of it.

My legs hurt for the rest of yesterday, but I was ok--made it back to Danville, etc. Obtained a pretty nice piece of furniture that calls itself a "bungee lounge" to lay in. Went to bed (for me) early.

This morning? Oh wow...

I can barely shuffle. Understand, my pain tolerance works a couple of ways--I complain, a lot, at first. Then I stop as the pain increases, and try to tough it out. Somehow, this morning, I've managed to blow right by both of those steps, and OH MAN does this hurt. And not just my legs, either, which I guess I was ready for, but all the core muscles you engage while running are pretty gone, too.

I don't know how I'm going to make it to the dining hall when they open. That invovles such impossibilites as steps, and a hill.

Countdown...

2007-04-27T07:42:00.000-05:00

...22 hours, 47 minutes...

Motivation Week, Wednesday

2007-04-25T21:55:00.000-05:00

One of the things that's gotten me most psyched about running this year, is my enthusiasm finally rubbing off on somebody else.

Oddly enough, it happened to two people, at the same time. And you know, I never really cared to run with other people--I'm SO antisocial about running. I go when I want, as far as I want, on my course and pace, to my music, and will not talk to you. Until now.

And then in the same week, my two friends that are so close they're practically family both picked it up. To embelish on a neologism from the dearly departed O.C., it was Chrismahanukwanzmakuh. I started running with them, helped them pick out shoes, even splurged and bought them both some gear so they weren't running in heavy cotton stuff (one was even wearing long sleeves. ew). I've totally come around to the social aspect of running, and through the backdoor, even. Go figure.

And I know I've been giving off inspirational running quotes...well, this one is a little different--this one is mine. I was asked not long ago if I was religious; here's how I responded:

"I don't know how to answer that...the closest I feel to God...I see a divine plan when I run. Maybe not any other time, and I certainly choose to get mad as hell at whatever God there is an awful lot...but I see him when I run."

Motivation Week Continues...

2007-04-24T21:31:00.000-05:00

...I'll confess, I steal ideas from NBA players.

I write stuff on my shoes. Every year.

The first year I ran, I had a Great Aunt and Uncle die unexpectedly less than a week before the race--and the funeral was scheduled for the saturday afternoon of the race. Fortunately for me, it wasnt until long after I was going to be finishedrecovered/showered...so I could still run. I thought it'd be a good way to motivate myself, so I wrote their initals on my week-old shoes.

Of course, I hadn't trained that hard that year, and you talk about a painful, painful race...

Last year...
I was supposed to run the marathon relay with a fraternity team, and lo and behold, it started drying up. As we got down from a five-man team to a four, then, three, and two-man, team, I finally resolved to running the mini, by myself. This was ok, except, I was, you know, not really trained up for this...
My grandfather was in the same fraternity as I was, and the same chapter, and we sequentially list ourselves--they're called roll numbers. So I put both of them (672, and 1412) on my shoes, which made me feel a little better about the big Beta bailout on me, and even though I hadn't been planning on it, I ran a strong mini, and ended up deciding that day to do what I'm doing this year...

The full Marathon. So what goes on the shoes this year? They've been blank, and I want to put something on there about how running is my therapy...
We'll see. I've got three days.

Today's Quote:
Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just Run.--Jumbo Elliott

Forgive Today's Delay on Motivation...

2007-04-23T22:41:00.000-05:00

...I've been working on getting that very first post-college job (even though I'm not graduating until December). Quoth Young Jeezy: Welcome to the life of a go getter.

Anyway, here's today's big-time runner motivational thingy, summarized from the QUOTABLE RUNNER:
One of New Zealand's all-time greats, Murray Halberg, once won an alarm clock in a race. Why was this bad?
The alarm clock was the prize for the first runner-up, a reminder to keep training harder next year, and bedside motivation--how would you feel to have your loss sounding reville every morning?
It could be depressing. It could have you up and out of bed extra fast for the next 364 days.

Of course, a fat lot of good that does right in the midde of your taper...but it's still a cool story, and if you're coming off of a bad race, it carries a more important message: no failure is permanent.

It's Motivation Week

2007-04-22T09:27:00.000-05:00

Marathon on SATURDAY. Countdown clock as I type: 5 days, 21 hours, 2 minutes, 3 seconds

We're close enough now for the weather reports to have any meaning beyond an average of previous years, and the high for that day is going to be 72. I'll start the race around 50, at 7:30am, and sometime just between 11:30 and noon, if all goes according to plan, I'll cross the line.

That is a wide, wide band of temperatures to deal with. And it's going to be sunny.

Personally, I'm doing everything I can to get myself up; I'm asking my friends and family to help build me a playlist (being an ipod type as I am), and running early in the day as opposed to late so I'm "used" to it for the race, and trying very hard to guilt one of my collegiate friends into driving me up and back. This is partially because I don't want to work the clutch on the way back, and mostly because the people here are as much my family as anybody else in this world.

And, I'll be writing here about running, a lot. Quotes, motivational tricks, stories, you name it. And yeah, I've got papers out the (redacted) for school. But the big push is on, and I'm not letting up now.

Quote to get myself worked up over today:
Big occasions and races which have been eagerly anticipated almost to the point of dread, are where great deeds can be accomplished.--Jack Lovelock

Hot, Nasty, Speed

2007-04-17T21:53:00.000-05:00

Yes, Ricky Bobby.

Ran my own little 5K tonight; took it down to 21:54, which is better than 22:36, which was my previous best. Of course, neither of those was in a race, so they don't REALLY count, but it made me smile.

The best part was that the first mile of my course is pretty flat and fast and has minimal traffic issues, so I was able to blow through it in 5:38...the ego was happy enough to almost climb up the obelisk in Constitution Square park in mid-stride.

Oh, and 10 days, 8 hours.

My whole body hurts

2007-04-15T18:38:00.000-05:00

And I think it might be because of how bad I tried to hurt myself yesterday.

So I don't know how bad the weather was in Louisville, but when I was running in Danville, which was to say early--had to get up to Ohio for some fraternity business--it was 41, and pouring rain.

I was wearing rain gear of course, and planning on going 14 miles...I got out 7 ok, and at my turnaround point, the wind became a factor.

Now it was raining so much that I was soaked to the bone anyway, but I was wearing it well, until the wind came to bear, and when this happened, it came big--on the level of 20 miles an hour. In ten minutes I couldn't feel my hands, face, or anything from the waist down. Picking up the pace, clapping my hands, etc wasn't helping, and this wasn't just cold--I was starting to think it's time to get off the road before I get seriously sick.

Thankfully I was wearing my fuelbelt, which is the only time I carry my cell phone, and started waking people up--my fourth option, who is now my hero, came and got my at the end of my 9th mile, which I almost sprinted to, and as soon as I was in the car I was stripping off wet clothes and wrapping myself in a towel. I couldn't feel half of my body and half of me felt like knives were being pushed into me.

When I got into the shower, I still couldn't feel anything, and it took a while, but finally, I got everything back--my legs were last, six hours later.

I hope nothing like that ever happens again. That was scary as hell.

Wow, I must be...

2007-04-09T06:54:00.000-05:00

...getting stonger.

Or something like it. Spent all day yesterday bouncing around Louisville doing family stuff, and I didn't feel tired, sore, anything. AND I had gottten up at 6am entriely of my own accord. Not quite sure how any of that happened, or how my body took the punch, but...wow.

Anyway, this is going to be another busy school week, but I'll try to write more interesting things, or at least get some nice big ones spun up in advance for the week of the marathon (read:motivation week).

22 in the cold

2007-04-07T17:17:00.000-05:00

Because didn't have a good landmark for a turnaround to do 21, which is what I was after.

But what about this cold snap, huh? Ran from Danville to the far side of Perryville (a little further, actually) and back in the wind and cold that was today--and me without my tights, left home after spring break because I thought it wouldn't get this cold again. Whoops.

And the wind was such a joy--13 miles an hour headwind until I turned around, and then it died down a little. It was amazing, I'm telling you. My ears darn near froze, and my face was kind of numb, but on the whole it was a good run--my first, and second ten miles were both faster than the ten-miler last weekend, in worse weather, over a hillier (if gentler) course.

Of course, after all of that, I came home, and spent a long, long time in the shower warming up.

Secondary concern: Saw on marathonguide.com that the USATF has changed their reccomendation that race directors ban headphones to a rule that they do. I'll go out on a limb and call this wrong, imperious hubris, done under the guise of safety, but really aimed at the face that they don't like people that wear headphones. Here's how it works, guys: headphones grow your sport. iPods. and everything like them, help people that wouldn't otherwise run, do it. I know you're worried about people getting tangled and such, but is it really that big of a deal that you'll force RDs to cut their fields? I don't think so, and I think the RDs won't, either.

Finally

2007-04-04T17:26:00.000-05:00

I have running back under control. Eight miles tonight, and everything felt great, and I felt like I could have gone further at the end of it all.

Two notable things about this:

First time I've felt like that since the LAST time it was this cold.

I've taken in about 4,000 calories over the past 24 hours.

I really, really hope it's the second, and not the first one of those that's been behind my recent struggles.

More after dinner, maybe; dining hall closes soon, and I don't want to go smelling like I do right now...

Ten-Miler

2007-04-01T14:33:00.000-05:00

So the Ten-Miler was yesterday; a few details plucked from my memory, in bullet form.

- I ran a 1:47:45; that was faster than last year, slower than to years ago, and a sign to me that either more was wrong than, you know, losing too much weight and overtraining, OR this stuff has just set up shop in my head. I was really hoping to turn in a 1:30, and just wasn't feeling it, and abandoned it early.

-The pace carrels were properly set up here, and I was still dodging walkers. That said, much, much, much better organized and executed than the first two legs of the Triple Crown, even in the face of...

-The Runner's World Effect. I had previously thought that people were just being jerks--I'll hold up Duluth here, because they seem like a ripe target. When races get a line in RW, people that have been running them for years inevitably complain online because the registration climbs and out of town talent streams in. Well...I have to agree with that, just based on what I saw standing at the start line and listening at the finish. Of course, I think it's awesome, but then again, I think they handled it great, too.

-Marathon on the 28th; time to get my mind right.

I work! I work!

2007-03-29T19:29:00.000-05:00

So, I went for my first run in...three days?

Everything turned right back on and worked, which is good news. I was slow, which is bad, and my hopes of cutting about 20 minutes off of my time from last year, which, while more than a little optimistic, was pretty in line with the shape I was in before all these shenanigans began. But I'll be ok to go on Saturday so long as I stretch and keep on doing what I'm doing.

Disaster averted. Phew.

Withdrawl Pains

2007-03-27T19:18:00.000-05:00

I am going through serious, serious running withdrawl.

If you noticed my posting absence, it's got to do with that.

I was at home for spring break, and therefore distracted, last week, and somehow fell off of the proverbial cliff on Wednesday.

I was running twelve miles, and...well, it didn't go so well.

I thought maybe it was a nutritional problem, or a hydration issue, or even the difference in terrain from where I'm at in Danville.

I fixed those, took some extra rest, and had the same thing happen Saturday during a 20-miler. Then again Monday.

Today I went to the doctor, and found out I'm 10 pounds lighter than I tought I was, and thirty down from two months ago; I think it's possible that even while I was being good about taking rest days, I created "dead legs" and the rest of typical overtraining conditions for myself by not taking in enough calories. Which would more than explain the weight loss. Just to make sure, I'm getting bloodwork done, and taking two days off (AHHHHHHRRRRGGGGGHHHHH).

More running, and presumably the resumption of normal posting, Thursday. Then cross-training Friday, the ten-miler, and back in the saddle again.

Or catastrophic failure, and a delay in my marathon plan. You know, one or the other. But I finish the triple crown Satruday if they have to carry me off the course.

City Run Recap

2007-03-18T09:38:00.000-05:00

Isn't it nice when I recap an event in the same seven days that it happened?

Don't worry, it's only happening because I'm up early and waiting for NCAA tournament games to start. Speaking of which, I've only missed 4 games, and am winning a pool with 1,184 people in it. Just thought you'd all like to know. In that same category, I just saw a commercial for American Gladiators on ESPN Classic. I'll never study again.

But on to the race: Another record-breaking turnout, and I suspect it would have been even more than the 6,000+ if the temperature had been a little higher. You know what, I'm lazy. Let's do the rest of this in a cheers and jeers format.

Cheers: My new PR, which is 47:22 now--the old one was 55:45.
Jeers: The sheer terror I felt at the 5K mark when I realized that if I'd stopped right then, it would be a 5K PR. I thought about backing off...and then kept going. The back half would have been a 5K PR, too. Booya.

Cheers: Race organizers, for getting shuttles back to the start area this year. Nice touch.
Jeers: Race orgainzers, for still not getting this "pace group" idea down. At least the Anthem had pace signs, although they were facing outside of the fenced-off starting area. This race had no pace signs, and no segregated area for walkers...some of who felt the need to be in the front of the pack. I welcome the walkers, and hope they turn out for the last two races of the "Grand Slam"...but there's no reason I should pass them. Ever.

Cheers: Everybody who turned out to watch despite the cold; you all get gold stars, a'la 1st grade.
Jeers: Yeah, no counterpart to this, except for the people who chose to ignore their friends, family, or in some cases, 6,000 people running by their door...boo to you. Of course, I say this, and didn't tell most of my family I was running, and was told not to let that happen again. So jeers to me, too.

Believe what they say about distance running making you faster...

Running Makes Me Happy; Midterms Don't

2007-03-14T17:33:00.000-05:00

Don't know if I'll be able to make it out today; just wanted to drop an "I'm alive" note, and talk a little about last night's run, which was interesting for two reasons, which I'll enumerate, and then shut up, because history and hinduism are both beckoning:
1) I still moved really, really fast over my first mile, but this was disturbing, not happy, like the night before, because I wasn't trying to. Now I'm going to worry a little about coming out of the gate too hard on Saturday and wheezing my way through the 10K. I ran 4 miles, but at farr too a pedestrian a pace considering how my 1st mile went.
2) Because my religion class had some guest musicians come in, I felt compelled to load up ye olde iPod with something called dhrupad, which is Indian/Hindu music. It was actually really cool, and did a lot help me maintain focus, and I think I'll have to make it become a permanent fixture...also, the guys that were in my class, were on itunes, which was worth mention. But it definitely helped me reign in my adrenaline.

Anyway. Back to studying, and maybe a short run tonight, but definitely not the 12 miles my training plan would have called for.

Bog Snorkeling, and NCAA Brackets Made Me Fast

2007-03-13T11:17:00.000-05:00

So my roommate told me today that the British government is seeing decline in tourism from the United States, and as a result is pushing new forms of tourism while in the Isles, to include motorcycling through Scotland (actually sounds very fun) and bog snorkeling (really? I feel like you'd look like the creature from the black lagoon. I told my girlfriend this, and she said you'd BE the creature from the black lagoon...). Anyway, I thought everybody should know that.
Also, apologies for not posting/being distracted/tired/whatever. I've been in the habit of posting right after I run, which means I'm either exhausted or giddy, and maybe both. It's not good writing, and I'll try to bring my "A" game more often. Of course, I'm saying this during midterms, so take that as you may. Also, It's NCAA week, and I'm spending more time with my bracket and a fat stack of statistics than I am any human being that I don't live with or regularly tell how pretty she is. Again, apologies.
All of that said...
Last night was some kind of a career night running. No wind, good temperature, shoes broken all the way in, feeling good, and I only had a 5K on my training plan, so I decided to go burn it up and see how fast I could go. Normally when I do this, I just blow the first mile and then scale back, cause, you know, I'm lazy...
Last night my first mile (flat, on the course I take) was 6:10, and I said, are you kidding, I have to push this as far as I can...I'm not nearly as sure where my 2nd split is, so I don't know how that breaks out, but I can imagine, because I turned in 22:36 for the night. This isn't bad, but it isn't great, either, except that 1) I haven't been that fast on a mile in four years, and 2) I've never been that fast over 3. I know it's nothing official, but hey, I'm pretty proud of myself. Who am I kidding, I was all smiles, and was bouncing up and down like a tennis ball when I hit my finish line (those of you familiar with Centre, it's the wrought iron arch at the warehouse). It only got worse when I actually saw my time, heh.

Oh, and on a side note, how great is this weather right now? I was walking back to my room last night at midnight, and there were people playing football in the street. Isn't college grand?

Anthem 5K Recap

2007-03-11T22:24:00.000-05:00

8 Days after the race.
Why? Why not. Today was a rest day, and I don't have any real running stuff to write about, so I may as well talk about that big (record crowd, from what I understand) race everybody did last weekend.
First things first, congrats to what I imagine had to be a reasonable amount of first-timers; beyond that, you get my apologies, because I was "that guy".
See, I had this unrealistic expectation that the pace group signs at the start would face inside the fences, and thereby make it easy for the runners to separate ourselves...
This, plus the big crowd, and my loathing of being cold (read: staying in the car as long as possible) meant that I was backed up pretty far in the pack, and had no idea just how far back in the pack I was. Uh-oh.
So, I bobbed and weaved, and cut back and forth, and generally made like Barry Sanders for the first two miles, because I imagine that while I meant, and had sincerely hoped, to be around the 8:00 group, I probably started with the 10:00s.

All that said, though, it was a beautiful morning, especially compared to the last two years, and I'm glad the snow held off until later in the day. Oh, and I missed PRing by 0:01. Can't decide if I'm happy about that, or if I'm even more frustrated that I spent so much of my time running sideways.

Well, nothing to do about that but take it out on the 10K.

And for the record, as much as I'm tired all over today, nothing hurts after 17 miles yesterday. So that's pretty cool. Maybe this Marathon thing will be more fun than I think.

Oh, Wow

2007-03-10T19:41:00.000-05:00

So, this hurts. After yesterday's wonderful weather, which was so pretty it inspired me to not only not go the gym to cross train, but to count being outside in the sun walking around ant talking about how pretty it was AS my cross training, I was really pretty excited to run 17 miles today, being rested and fresh, and antsy as always after I take a day off.
Of course, today's weather was dark, and windy, and rainy. Figures. And today was one of those days that I just couldn't get my calves going with stetches, so I had to run the rust off of them with the first three miles...so, ew. That, plus a headwind...well, yuck.
Yes, me talking like a valley girl is a sign of distress.
Oh, and it rained on me after I got a few miles out, too. But I didn't mind that so much because I had brought a jacket. In any event, I'm just in too much pain to be witty/fun right now.
I made the rookie mistake of only taking the water I could carry on my fuel belt, and not stashing bottles. Dumb, dumb, dumb. Not like anybody's going to snatch them in between Danville and Perryville.
Speaking of Danville and Perryville...love the course. I am going to be SO ready for the parks this year.

Oh, and 5K recap tomorrow, because I haven't yet, and I realized that while running. Maybe I won't be so scattered, then.

Know why you shouldn't post when you're tired?

2007-03-08T19:12:00.000-05:00

It makes you scatter-brained.
The more I run this year, the more evident it is to me that I trained not at all in the years prior. I mean, I meant to train; I went out, and I ran a little bit every few nights, and I would, indeed, run until I was tired, or cold, and experiment with my route a little bit...but it strikes me that I probably never once, in my previous two Triple Crown/mini seasons, went more than five miles at a stretch if it wasn't a race.
This explains SO much of my previous loathing of the ten miler. Also why I'm feeling like a well-oiled machine this year, when I'm bothering to go out every day, cross-train, etc, etc. Amazing what the threat of 26 miles hanging over your head will do for your motivation. Oh, and I'm better at my route planning, too. The utility on usatf.org is like magic.

Also, I think it's worth mention that with Danville and Centre both being so small, you can't help but pass your professors homes, cars, etc, and I really, really keep wanting it to be weird, because let's be honest, both parties know I pay more attention to running than I do class.
That said, it's not. The profs that see me/know about my obsession are actually very supportive-- ask about it a lot, wave that sort of thing. I'd like to make a remark about it being weird because it's not weird, but I'm not articulate enough, and it's not strange at all; I just think it's wonderful that even at a place so bent on making us the smartest humans alive (it seems) they'll give me room to work on something else.

Oh, and I'd like to add that it's still windy here. This is good, because the girlfriend and I have invested in a kite; bad because it's still a magic headwind (Mercifully, this hasn't been true on the long runs). Cross-Training tomorrow; hopefully there's no breeze inside the gym.

New Shoes!

2007-03-08T08:19:00.000-05:00

Very briefly, hi, everybody! I'm Ben, and if you've got too many questions about who I am, well, there's a novel of a biography in the column to the right.
I have to confess, I was pretty upset with Brooks for making the Adrenaline what I lovingly refer to as "Tennessee Orange" last year; I was still hoping that I could hold off on replacing them until AFTER the marathon, though. This, as it turns out, was not to be.
So I'm "training", have been since January, and haven't had any health problems at all. Three days ago I was churning down Main Street Danville (which is kind of like Main Street Mayberry, and I mean that in the best way), and felt this pain in my, uh, hind quarters.
I called my physical therapist mother (conversation shortened for brevity).
"Mom, my (redacted) is broke"
"Ok, it's probably your sciatic nerve. I'll send you some stretches"
She did, and it helped make sure that I could run on it, but it didn't go away forever/stop happening, and it was in both legs. Well, I finally looked at my shoes, and...yeah, it looked like I had taken the impact points at the heels off with a file.
Quick trip to the running store down here, which I hit every chance I get, on the grounds that doing that keeps a running store in a town like this. Seven miles in the new BLUE Adrenaline 7s last night, and everything felt perfect, except I was craving a Krispy Kreme when I got home.

In related news (related, meaning, running): The weather yesterday was WONDERFUL until the temperature fell 12 degrees in an hour when the sun went down. Also, I've given up on the wind in Danville--whichever way I turn when I'm downtown, I'm going into it. Oh, and was anybody else arrogant enough to think to themselves that all the people that were jogging yesterday in the 60 degree weather that weren't out in the crud before were posers? I need to chill out.
In nutritional news, I've given up beer--actually all forms of alcohol--until the end of the Marathon, where I'm pretty sure I recall there being free beer in years past. I didn't miss this until I had wings two nights ago. The self-imposed ice cream ban...that was more immediate...