Mar 26, 2007
I suspected things were worse than initially diagnosed when I still had trouble walking last week. I went into my appointment on Tuesday hoping for the best and obviously this news was very disappointing for a number of reasons. I find out tomorrow if I will need to have the tendon surgically repaired.
The range of emotions this last week has been wide. I've gone from the shock of hearing the news (I literally almost passed out) to disappointment (I hate not being able to run the Papa Johns and Mini) to acceptance (ok, so running here in June, July, and August isn't the worst thing in the world.)
These next months will much harder for me mentally than physically. Running is a big part of my life and has been for almost half the time I have been alive. When you have to give up something that you love to do, it's definitely not easy. There will be a lot of things I will miss especially my running friends (though I'll still join them for coffee occasionally), competing in races, the state of good health that running affords, and these crazy things called endorphins that give me a boost most days.
Even in the 2 weeks that have passed since my injury, I've noticed life is very different without running. I don't have the usual voracious appetite (that's a good thing considering I now really need to watch my diet) and don't have the same energy level. It also seems like I have a ton of time on my hands now. I'm watching a lot of tv (shouldn't that Sanjaya kid be kicked off American Idol by now?), reading, and even started putting together a massive jigsaw puzzle (if that's not a sign I am getting older, I don't know what is.) I do make it a habit to lift weights and do situps every night to maintain some level of fitness.
I am not going to lie, it's tough. I wish I could say I wasn't jealous of other runners enjoying this great weather, but that's not the case (I am trying to curb my habit of cursing everytime I see someone out running!) I don't feel sorry for myself because I'm actually pretty lucky (for one it could have been my right leg and I would not be able to drive!) In general I have good health, great friends, a loving wife, and hopefully a lot to look forward to. I know I will be back and ready to run, hopefully sooner than later.
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