May 3, 2007
So the good news is, being done with the marathon means I can back off of training like crazy and do a little bit more of what I want--the bike is starting to look a little cobwebby. The bad news is, and I have no better way to put this, I am all out of Crusades.
My personality is such that I have to have some all-consuming passion at all times in my life. It used to be my fraternity (Because, well, if you don't know the story, I can't explain it here, but I transferred into my grandfather's chapter and tried to fix a colossal debt, a hazing culture, and a drug problem.), but after I lost that battle and the chapter closed, I said ok, I'm going to run a marathon. Thankfully, that adventure turned out better, but to say the least, I obsessed over it.
Now, I don't really have anything left to obsess over, and it's got me feeling kind of lost. I mean, I've got schoolwork, and our finals are coming, and then summer classes, and then my last term ever...but schoolwork has never been somethingto ignite my passion, and that's what I'm after here. School is just a job, something I'll do to get where I really want to be (oddly enough, grad school. But leave my hippocracy out of this, because I'm taking so **** many classes out of my major right now it's not funny. Freaking liberal arts schools.). What I want now, is the next way I can define myself.
Ben Ray, Beta Theta Pi, Marathoner, ???
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